I got this letter today at my job at the Corset Shop.
I know it might be a little hard to read, it say
Dear Sir or Madam,
Hi my name is Ken ________ and I need your help
I need to purchase gloves for Maria _____. Unfortunatly, I can’t visit your store because I am shy and afraid of new people, especially if they are Tax evaders. I have no idea if you or your customers are tax evaders so I just assume everyone is until they show me proof.
Anyways, Maria is an Illegal Alien and she is slightly taller than me (I am this tall) with two (2) medium sized hands, black hair and an eight (8) pound head. Based upon this information what size glove should I buy. I do not want to spend too much but I do not want to spend too little because she has black hair.
If these are good gloves I will send you cash or money in the mail. Which ever you prefer. I find that is the best way to do business.
Please let me know as soon as possible because I am not good at buying clothes.
The funny thing is, I get creepy letters all the time at my job. I keep them in a box by our fire place. My boss and I keep joking around about publishing them into a book.